9 Signs you might need to see a couples' therapist

Love and relationships aren’t always a simple and straightforward path and occasionally couples may find themselves facing certain challenges that require professional help and guidance.

Dr Emily May, a relationship therapist at Private Sugar Club has revealed the nine most common signs that indicate it could be time for you and your partner to seek expert help in order to maintain a healthy and loving relationship.

When conversations are replaced by arguments, silence or frequent misunderstandings, this should be treated as a red flag. Effective communication is essential for any healthy relationship so if you find it hard to express yourself without tension or frustration, getting the guidance of an expert can help you to rebuild communication.

It may be that you’re struggling to talk about a certain topic, or perhaps you feel like your views aren’t respected anymore. Either way, a therapist can help you to rebuild a healthy way of talking.

Arguments and disagreements are a natural and healthy part of any relationship but when they happen regularly or small issues escalate into intense arguments, this can be a sign that there is a deeper issue. Arguments that go on for days, without a resolution, can also indicate a more serious underlying issue.

A therapist can help you to identify any underlying concerns that could be triggering arguments and guide you to find healthier and more effective ways to address them.

If you feel emotionally distant from your partner, this is also concerning. Perhaps you feel like you don’t support each other anymore or that feelings and emotions aren’t valued.

With endless responsibilities, many couples find that after a day of work they come home and become enthralled with mobile phones and TV—another sign of emotional distance. A therapist can help you to reconnect and understand each other’s emotional needs.

Romance and intimacy is essential for any romantic relationships so a significant decrease in the physical and emotional intimacy can highlight an issue. It’s not just about sexual experiences but also physical closeness and quality time spent together. With a therapist, you can work to find out the reason for this change and also build a more fulfilling connection.

Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship so if there is a lack of trust, either because of past events or a suspicion, it’s essential to work around this.

Trust can be rebuilt and established but it can take time which is why you might find that a skilled therapist is needed to help you navigate through the complexities of it.

Life changes like the birth of a child, relocation, a new job or grief can put a huge strain on relationships. Some couples will be able to work through it and will likely come out stronger but others will struggle to navigate the challenges and change.

This is where a skilled therapist can come in ensuring that your relationship remains resilient.

Individuals can have different aspirations but still enjoy a healthy relationship—whether it’s children, marriage or something else. But it’s important that both partners are on the same page about each other or at least are aware of what the other person wants from the relationship, which is where communication comes in.

Different expectations about the future of the relationship can soon lead to conflict. A trained therapist can help to create a safe space where you can both have an open conversation, helping you to find common ground and better understand each other’s desired future.

Whether it’s something that’s happened in this relationship, something connected to a previous relationship or even past trauma, the past can really impact how someone behaves and thinks in the present. This can even present itself in arguments, resulting in tension and trust issues. A therapist can help you to explore these unresolved issues and help to emotionally heal both partners.

Individuals can be very different and have different aspirations but still enjoy a healthy relationship. But if individuals evolve too much, this can lead to a shift in values and priorities which can have an impact on the relationship. If you and your partner find it hard to align your goals and values, a therapist can help initiate the discussion to better understand each other and work towards a healthy compromise.

Seeking the help of a relationship therapist doesn’t mean your relationship has failed. Instead, consider it as a way of investing in the health of your relationship, and by addressing any issues early on, you’re moving towards a more fulfilling and healthy connection in the long term.