3 Easy ways to make love last

Everyone needs a litte help with love sometimes. We show you some easy ways you can make a romance stick

1. Shop for the right spouse

Did you know that there’s actually a formula that predicts whether a marriage will succeed? Beatty Cohan, a psychotherapist in Sarasota, Florida, and coauthor of For Better, for Worse, Forever: Discover the Path to Lasting Love, offers these predictors for a successful marriage:

Look to the parents. Check out your beloved’s family background, particularly the parents’ relationship, to get a good idea of the behavior he’s been exposed to. What we learned as kids we often play out as adults.

Listen carefully. Identify how your potential partner communicates. Also pay attention to how he or she handles sticky situations and painful emotions.

Is there compromise? If you’re forever giving in, then you’ve got a problem. Compromise is one of the key elements of a healthy relationship.

Is there true intimacy? We’re not just talking between the sheets here, but the kind of intimacy that comes with looking out for each other when you're ill of feeling down and doing small acts of kindness just to make the other one happy.

2. Don’t just tell them you love them—show them

Karen Sherman, Ph.D. author of Marriage Magic! Find It, Keep It, Make It Last, offers these hints on little ways you can show your mate how much you love him or her:

  • Surprise your partner with their favorite dessert
  • Give them a foot or back massage— without them having to ask for it
  • Tuck a note into their briefcase
  • Leave them an unexpected text

 

3. Take some alone time away from the children

One of the toughest times in a marriage is when you have young children. Finding alone time takes creativity. So how about these creative tips culled from young parents:

Keep them occupied. If the children are old enough to play alone in the fenced backyard, throw 99 pennies out there and tell them whoever finds 100 pennies first wins a prize.

Invest in hardware. That would be a lock, for your bedroom door.

Set the alarm. Wake up at 3 a.m., make love, go back to sleep.

Hire a babysitter. Find one to take the children away for the day or stay at home while you do something fun.

Take advantage of naptime. Who says you have to do the laundry while your two-year-old naps—use the quiet to catch up, talk about something other than children or do something fun.