4 Common sex dysfunctions and how to deal with them

If you’re having a problem during sex, you’re not alone. Millions of people are everyday feeling the same way. We’ve highlighted four of the most common dysfunctions men and women can experience. Don’t worry, all of them are normal and all of them are fixable.

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HSDD can cause emotional issues in your relationship. Credit: TatyanaGI

If you (or your partner) have zero interest in sex, and it’s causing stress for both of you, it could be because of HSDD.

Low libido is a common sexual problem, experienced by both women and men (though there are higher rates of it in women.

There can be many contributing factors. Testosterone is an important part of your sex drive, so low levels of this (which can happen with age) may cause your lowered libido. Medications, such as antidepressants, and thyroid disease can have the same effect.

Your sex drive being low could be linked to your mental health too. Stresses of everyday life or fears about sex could prevent you from being present enough to orgasm.

Fixing your low libido depends on what is causing it. If there’s trouble in your relationship, there’s not a pill to solve that. Couples’ therapy or sex therapy is the answer.

If the issue is biological though (whether it is from thyroid disease or menopause), there are options too. Testosterone gel can help get your libido back up.

Achieving orgasm penetratively isn't always the most effective route to orgasm, if you have a vagina. Credit: Prostock-studio

If you’re someone with a vagina and you get aroused by sex but can never manage to achieve the orgasm you’re looking for, it’s a condition called anorgasmia.

Many, many people with a vagina struggle to have an orgasm during intercourse and it’s rare that this is caused by a nervous system problem such as multiple sclerosis.

In truth, penetration is simply not the most practical way to achieve orgasm and clitoral stimulation is needed.

It is absolutely possible for you to experience orgasm, but it’s going to be up to you to work out what you’ll need. Some women prefer oral sex, some enjoy sex toys and for others its manual stimulation. Vibrator usage is good for both your sexual health and your mental health.

Remember to communicate with your partner and, importantly, to relax; sex is supposed to be enjoyable. If your anxiety is becoming concerning though, counselling can help.

Prematurely ejaculating isn't something to be ashamed of. There are ways of dealing with it. Credit: twinsterphoto

If you or your partner always ejaculates before they want to, then premature ejaculation is the cause.

This is an extremely common issue, often due to sexual inexperience, but possible at any age. Other causes are performance anxiety, stress, relationship problems or even abuse during childhood.

The best thing that you can do, if you are experiencing premature ejaculation frequently is to talk about it. Talking about it is not as embarrassing as you think.

Learning to delay ejaculation, through exercises such as squeezing the end of the penis before climaxing can be effective. Wearing a condom or a desinsitising lubricant can help too.

If more help if needed, psychotherapy may be useful or antidepressents, which can delay ejaculation.

Dyspareunia can happen because of a lot of causes. Credit: monkeybusinessimages

If you or your partner feels pain during or after sex or orgasm, this is dyspareunia. Pain might be felt externally, deep inside the vagina, or in the belly or pelvis.

There can be many different causes for dyspareunia. In women, vaginal dryness is often the cause but it could also be because of an ovarian cysts, endometriosis, a vaginal infection, vaginismus, and vulvodynia.

For men, it could be from a prostate infection or skin irritation.  

It can be hard sometimes to talk about pain during sex, but seeking medical help can be extremely beneficial. Doctors can identify an underlying cause, teach relaxation exercises or recommend simple fixes such as using lubrication.

Banner Credit: Unhappy couple (Prostock-studio)

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