How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work

When you start a new relationship, you need to have a plan of action – a set of goals to achieve. You and your partner must talk about the dreams and wishes you both have from the relationship and life in general, and come up with common goals you want to work towards to.

Creating this plan is especially important if you live far from each other, as both of you probably don’t want to spend rest of your lives living apart. You don’t need to set a date in stone and situations do change, but you need to be on the same page when it comes to the direction your relationship is going.

This guarantees you both know the aim of your time together and it helps to draw the boundaries. Perhaps you are both looking for something not too serious and wish to take the relationship one-step at a time, but unless you discuss this thoroughly with your partner, you can’t be sure you are both on the same page. Don’t assume - discuss.

It is often best to casually drop these things into the conversation at first. Asking someone to sit down to discuss your ‘relationship’ after you’ve been dating for a few weeks might scare them off!

Communication is key to success in every relationship, but it is especially important in a long distance relationship, as you don’t have any daily physical contact. You need to take time to talk every day to give you that sense of closeness that other couples get by living together or meeting regularly.

Don’t just share the more exciting things in your lives, but make sure you talk or text about the more mundane aspects as well. Saying “goodnight” or “good morning” might not sound like such an important thing to do every day, but it can be a very important way to feel closer and more connected to your partner.

You should also spice up the communication by changing the ways you keep in touch. Don’t just text, call or Skype, but send video clips, write letters and share photos. This not only shows you have put some more effort and thought into the communication, but also guarantees you don’t get too used to the same old routines.

Doing the face to face aspect of the communication adds a more personal touch, too, even if it is just a quick Skype call or FaceTime.

Depending on the distance, work schedules, and various other factors, the amount of times you can see each other face-to-face might differ from a few times a year to as often as every weekend, but the key is to make sure you regularly do so. It’s a good idea to have a visit planned at all times, whether or not you’ll end up seeing each other before this date or not, because it makes the wait just a bit easier.

Perhaps you could plan for a holiday together or just book the tickets for a weekend visit in either person’s location. Saying goodbye to your loved one is a lot easier when you already know the date you’ll see again. Having a plan also stops the relationship from fizzling out because you’re both too busy to make arrangements.

It might seem hard to create memories and have hobbies together when you are living far apart, but you should try to ensure you do things together, even if not at the same location. You could watch the same movies, try to read the same book at the same time or even cook the same foods together. These little actions bring you two closer together and give you both similar experiences to strengthen your bond.