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How to follow up on your first date


1st Jan 2015 Dating & Relationships

How to follow up on your first date
If you've just started dating again, it can be hard getting to grips with relationship etiquette. If a first date went well, how do you broach the subject of moving onto a second meeting?

Don't ask on your first date

Get the first date out of the way before thinking about the next one. Even if you enjoyed yourself, let your date know that you had fun and make hints about maybe doing it again, without being too direct. You should also be able to gauge at the end of the first date how well it went and if your date had fun too. Only tell your date that you'll get in touch if you have the intention of doing so.

Quick text message

Mobile phones have simplified dating, so use this to your advantage. If you enjoyed your first date, send a quick text message when you get home to ask if your date got home safely, and to thank them for a lovely time. If your date responds and shares your same positive enthusiasm, then maybe you could broach the subject of meeting again sometime. Sending a text message is a little less forward than calling up and is ideal for those initial communications following a first date. It also gives you time to think about exactly what you want to write. However, make sure that you compose your text messages carefully so that you get across exactly what you want to say. Avoid using abbreviations or text speak.

Call up

If your date gives you their telephone number, take it as a sign that they want you to get in touch. If you don't like the idea of communicating by text message, which can be a bit impersonal, pluck up the courage to give them a call. Many people question how long after a first date you should wait to get in touch again. There are no hard and fast rules, but generally leaving it for a day or two is recommended. If you call straight after the date, it might scare the person off, especially if they aren't used to dating, but if you leave it too long, your date may think you're not interested or that you can't make your mind up, so getting the balance right is preferable.

Topics of interest

It can be hard gearing up to ask someone for a second date, but if you enjoyed the first one, try to remember things that your date told you that they enjoy or find interesting. If they mentioned they like a particular type of cuisine, for instance, consider asking if they'd like to join you at a restaurant sometime that specialises in that cuisine. If they talked about the arts or visiting museums, ask if they'd like to accompany you on a trip to see a forthcoming art exhibition. If you have specific things to talk about, it can give you the confidence to ask for a second date.
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