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The Power of Self-Destruction: What You Need to Know

BY READERS DIGEST

25th Aug 2020 Wellbeing

The Power of Self-Destruction: What You Need to Know

Self-destructive behavior is when we cause ourselves unnecessary harm. Here's what you need to know about the power of self-destruction.

We have many obstacles to overcome in our lives. Whether it be career progression, adversity, or any number of personal hardships. However, what if the biggest obstacle you need to overcome is yourself?

The power of self-destruction is a real and challenging possibility for many people out there. They actively sabotage their own lives, restraining themselves from their full potential and ultimate happiness.

So, how can you go about breaking that negative thought process and self-destruct cycle?

Let’s explore the ways in which you can identify your self-destructive behavior and what you can do to challenge your brain into a new way of thinking.

What is Self-Destruction?

Self-destruction is a pattern of behavior that people fall into that negatively impacts their life, opportunities and often their loved ones. A person that falls into the powers of self-destruction will go out of their way to implode and disrupt any positive attributes in their life.

This implosion can have significant repercussions for that person. Psychologically, it stems from feelings of inadequacy and shame. The self-destruction is an unconscious response saying, “I don't deserve good things to happen to me.”

This is where people can turn to alcohol, drugs, unhealthy eating, harming their mental well-being, or destroying close personal relationships to them.

The negative thought patterns and cycle can be a hard cycle to break. However, once you recognize that your negative thought patterns are the thing that is holding you back, it can be a real turning point. 

You deserve happiness and love and kindness. Allow yourself the energy to put this back into your life.

Identify Your Triggers 

Take the time to sit down and think about when your self-destructive behavior occurs. What are the triggers that make you spiral? Speak to your loved ones and friends who may also be able to help you identify them.

It may take some time, but a pattern will start to emerge. Perhaps the self-destruction behavior is related to relationships, your career, or even your family itself?  Some relationships can be extremely complicated and complex and can have a negative effect on your mental health. 

Once you have identified your triggers, then consider which type of destructive behavior they lead to.

Write it all down and figure out your automatic brain response to your triggers. For example, “Every time I get overwhelmed at work, I end up drinking too much,” or, “When I can't handle feelings of failure, I shout at my partner.” 

This is important exploration that can lead to a greater understanding of how your brain behaves, so you can change it. 

Embrace Your Failures and Flaws

People have this expectation that their lives need to be perfect, otherwise they are a failure. This is simply not true. Our lives are a patchwork quilt of different fabrics such as family, love, money, children, career, friends, and plenty more.

The reality is that you can never align these all perfectly at any one time with your needle and thread. Things will ebb and flow, you might have fantastic friends and a great partner, but you aren't where you want to be in your career. That's okay.

Life is about balance, and you will experience setbacks and failure. That's only natural. Don't let those failures get the best of you though, use those failures as a learning experience, and what you can do to improve next time.

Never feel guilty for wanting to make positive changes in your life. Cut yourself some slack in how you view yourself. We are all humans with our own unique character traits and flaws. 

Perfection does not exist in one pure form. Be grateful for your achievements in the different areas of your life, and work towards your progression in others.

Don't let your own inner saboteur hold you back, those voices inside yourself do not need to consume you. You have all the tools inside of you to make those positive changes. Your imperfections are what make you, you.

Change Your Negative Thought Patterns

When you have identified your triggers, plan for what you will do when the situation occurs again. Developing coping strategies is the surest way to break your self-destructive patterns.

For example, if you are feeling stressed or overwhelmed, instead of turning to alcohol or drugs as a coping mechanism, go for a walk or do some exercise. Break those behaviors by replacing your activities with positive ones.

Speak to your friends and family to help you put a schedule or system in place for when you feel like you are wanting to fall back into old habits. So, when you are feeling low or self-destructive, you have various options to choose from that will calm you down.

Spiritual yoga, writing, guided meditation, even watching a favorite series on the television or Netflix can all be good distractions for when you feel like you are finding things difficult.

It's a long process to freeing yourself from your own self-destruction. However, by allowing yourself to move away from feelings of guilt and inadequacy and focus on the positives, you will have developed resilience and greater strength of character. 

The Power of Self-Destruction: Where Can I Find Out More?

Hopefully you have learned how to overcome and face the challenges of self-destruction.

Self-destruction no longer needs to consume your life, goals, and relationships. Implement these changes into your daily life and see how you can prosper and grow. Leave those negative thought patterns and cycles in the past where they belong. 

If you have any further questions or queries, take a look at our previous blog posts or even arrange a free 45-minute clarity call with one of our team.

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